Wednesday

Magaret's Head Cozie

Margret loved knitting. She had learned only recently after her husband Earl ran off with that floozie from his office. Her therapist thought it would be good for Margret to keep her hands busy- and something to keep her from throwing darts at Earls photo in the basement. That was over 8 months ago. She picked up knitting rather quickly- and before long she found herself knitting for hours and hours everyday. After all she didn't have to stop and make gourmet dinner for Earl anymore. She didn't have to chill his beer glasses, empty his ashtrays, do his laundry. She didn't have to watch sports with him and pretend to enjoy it anymore either. She had lots of free time now that Earl was gone. And that suited Marget just fine. So she knitted a few sweaters for her pastor, her neighbors and a mail bag for her mail man. She made toast cozies and toilet cozies- everything in her house was cozied. It was a very cosy house with Earl gone. Then one day Marget got the idea. It came to her as she fitted the cozie she had made over her cookie jar; she needed a cozie for HER. She knitted through the night and put the cozie on in the morning. She wore it all day and all night. Then one day Earl stopped by to pick up a few things....and Margret opened the door wearing her head cozie. Earl didn't say a word. He blinked. Then he asked if she had been saving his subscriptions to Popular Science magazine. She nodded yes and pointed to the basement. He went down the basement stairs. She shut the basement door. No one knows what happened to Earl after that....but I have a feeling he is pretty cosy down there now.

6 comments:

barefoot gypsy girl said...

You are seriously whacked! :)

shelly said...

Hahahahaha! Oh -- belly-laughter! BWAhaha! This is the funniest thing I've read in such a long time! Thank you. I needed that!

Suzanne said...

Margaret is a good egg.

Becky said...

Can I get one of those for my Mother In Law?

Just a joke, people.

Actually, I really need one. You should see me before 10 am.

:) The Maid

Amy said...

Good grief that's ugly! That must've been one seriously disturbed lady!

Well Behaved Krissy said...

This is HILAROUS!!! Sooo soo funny!